I was hanging out at night in a small little public park with some new friends. There were about a dozen of us, mostly guys, drinking and getting high (y’all know me, I don’t do anything federally illegal in the USA so I wasn’t getting high). Someone brought speakers and was playing music. There was a bit of dancing, just a great vibe overall. I was a little too drunk and was rooted to my bench. This guy called Marcel (real name forgotten, but he’s a Marcel for sure) was introducing me and chatting with me. Nice guy, talks a lot. He starts bragging about knocking people out, and internally I’m like “ah, here comes the machismo, yeah go on bud tell me about how you knocked two people out in the last two weeks”. He shares his stories and I try not to be outwardly skeptical. He looks like just some guy and I don’t believe his boasts. Eventually he wanders off and I start chatting with someone else.

I hear a distant noise and before I know it some shirtless guy is beside our group and shouting furiously at us. He’s real fucking mad. Worse, he sounds really emotionally hurt, like I’ve never heard before. A girl shouts “go away Carlos”. Carlos does not go away. He’s wild eyed, pacing, with balled fists, ready for a fight. I’m seated closest, not even two meters away from him, and I’m terrified he’s going to look at me and hurt me, for being unfamiliar or something. He’s shouting at how they all betrayed him, and won’t leave him alone, I can’t really make sense of it.

His pacing makes him turn to me sometimes and every time he does I stop breathing and freeze. He’s right fucking there, he can swing and I’ll be fucked before I know it. I have zero confidence I can defend myself. Even if I wasn’t too drunk he looked strong. If he tries to beat me: I’m getting hurt real bad. I don’t think I can even run, just curl up and hope somebody saves me. We all try to ignore him and look at the ground, to avoid provoking him further. He keeps shouting. I’m really scared. Then some guy emerges out of nowhere – “Bubs is coming” – and Bubs does not look intimidating (think shorter Hannibal Burress) but he does this “I’m going to fuck you up” walk towards Carlos and Carlos backs up and is forced out of the square. Bubs goes back to wherever the fuck he emerged from.

All goes back to normal if a little more subdued. Marcel returns and starts chatting. Five minutes later Carlos starts shouting and walking back at the group. Bubs emerges again and stands at the edge of our little square and zones Carlos. Carlos is still furious but everyone but Bubs is ignoring him, who’s staring him down and keeping him from coming closer.

I notice Marcel end his conversation. I see his posture shift, his shoulders hunch a little, and my caveman brain wakes up. Danger. Marcel turns and starts approaching Carlos and I realize he’s not playing: he’s going to fuck Carlos up. This isn’t a schoolground fight. If Carlos doesn’t move someone is going to become an unconscious body. The penultimate objectification (second only to someone becoming a regular body). Just from the violence in Marcel’s walk I’m now believing his stories of knocking two guys out in the last two weeks.

Carlos backs up. Marcel keeps walking at him, Bubs joins him, and they run Carlos out of the park. Carlos shouts from afar and eventually leaves.

New gender expression unlocked: literally defending your friends by predator-mode slow-charging some violent asshole until you run him off enough times he leaves, and having your threats be backed up by violence enough times that you merely have to make the threat.

This was in a more or less a cop-free zone, so if nobody dealt with Carlos we would have had to leave or end the night. Thanks Bubs and Marcel.

I really loved this primal and unmediated interaction. I’ve been looking to have more of this stuff in my life but I never imagined I’d get to see this. I hope one day to participate.